Monday, May 7, 2018

30 DAYS!!!!!


Wow 30 days!!! (sorry playing catch up with this new blog, the official 30 days was on 4/20)
Anyways..... 30 FrEAKinG DAYS!!!! I would never thought I could make it this far.  Ya I have been sober before for 9 months 3 times in my life but when you are growing eyeballs and ears it kind of gives you strength to do what is best for the baby :).

What have I discovered in the last 30 days???
  • I feel AMAZING!!!!! I have so much more energy which has been an issue for me for some time now.  I was always complaining how tired I was and life was so boring because I had no energy like those crazy people that can do so much in a day.  Well I am that crazy person. Yes I do get tired of course but I feel 100% better.
  • My bowel movements are so much better also.  I know TMI but at the young age of 40 I had to have a colonoscopy to make sure all was well down in the bottom end.  In my heart I knew it was the alcohol but of course I just wanted a pill to fix it so I continue the path I was traveling.  But during this procedure I also discovered I had precancerous esophagus (Barrett's Disease).  Well I knew it was from drinking but of course I would not admit it to anyone.  It was just from reflux which is common for most normal people right? ON that note, the reflux is so much better.  I thought of going off my medication but figure I will wait until the next scope to make sure I am on the mend. Cancer is nothing to mess with.
  • The Wine Witch is not calling so much anymore.  Ya I will get a tiny craving every now and then but it leaves quickly.  Except Sunday was a little more difficult.  The weather was nice I did a lot of spring cleaning and cleaned out some of my flower beds (mind you I have not done in YEARS).  Well I thought when the DH got off work we could take a ride up country and take the dogs for a run (them not me, I have not come that far yet).  I was planning to make a wonderful dinner of hot dogs and potato salad.  Well the closer it was time for  DH to get off the more I was wanting to have a glass of wine and enjoy the nice weather.  Going for rides previously always entailed drinking so I quickly changed my mind and we just cooked the hot dogs on the BBQ.  It was nice and the nagging WW was defeated and I enjoyed the rest of the evening.
  • My moods are much more consistent now.  If I am cranky, I am cranky and know why (well sometimes, I am still a woman).  But I feel I am on an even kilter most nights.  DH did tell my DS the other night that I am much more enjoyable to be around and don't get so ornery anymore so I guess that is a plus!!
  • Like said in previous post, my anxiety is better by tenfold.  Ya I am still nervous, but nothing like I was before.  I can't remember if I discussed this or not, but Dear Hubs and I went shopping out of town a couple weekends ago and normal on the interstate I have my head ducked down most of the trip and freaking out grabbing DH and stressing him out.  But oddly this trip I was actually able to watch us travel down the road.  Don't get me wrong we did pass a semi at one point and I had to turn my head, but nothing like I use to be.
  • Weight... I have only lost 6 pounds. But considering I have substituted the drink for sweets I feel pretty good about it.  I never ate sweets before because I had to save the calories to partake by cup. I have to say a chocolate granola bar or a Reese's cup isn't so bad for me at this point.
  • As I said I only lost 6 pounds but my face does look much better if I say so myself.  My jowls are less prominent that is for sure.  My eyes are defiantly not as poofy.  I don't look like I just got out of bed all day long!! I have even been taking "selfies" to show my progress.  I normally do not see the good, but I can see the difference is positive.
  • Shakes are nonexistent.  Before I would roll myself out of bed and the hubs would have breakfast done.  As I pour our orange juice I could barely hit the glass.  But in all honesty I didn't think it was from drinking.  I have always been a shakey person but this was horrible.  I chalked it up to being hungry as they seemed to get better after I would eat.  No I did not drink in the morning so it never registered it was withdrawals already since I was probably still drunk or way hung over.
Well that is all I can come up with now, but I am sure there are many more significant changes.  I am so enjoying this AF life I only pray the honeymoons keeps on a lasting.

PS.... I have also saved over $450.   Unfortunately I don't notice it my checkbook as drinking was not a budgeted expense.  I seem to transfer money from saving more now which is very agitating but I think it is because I am actually dealing with life now and I am balancing my checkbook weekly instead of hoping all is good until payday

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